Improve Your Fiction Writing
If you want to improve your writing work on this:
Keep a scene to one point of view.
The point of view is the “eyes” that are viewing the scene. You put yourself into that character’s skin and see and think and feel thing through their experience. If you have a scene with John and Mary you need to choose one of them to tell the story of that particular scene. If you choose Mary, she can’t know what John is thinking or feeling unless John directly tells and/or shows her.
BAD Example:
John thought to himself that he couldn’t let Mary get away with such an outright lie again. He’d show her who was boss.
She just knew what he was thinking. Well two could play that game and Mary was an expert. She’d put John in his place.
BETTER Example.
“You’re pretty good at propagating mistruth, Mary,” John said as calmly as he was able. Mary knew how to push his buttons but he wasn’t going
to let her win this time.
“Maybe, but I’m tellng the truth. You think I’m nothing but a liar, but the bottom of the gulch has a decaying body in it, scouts honor.”
She crossed her arms over her ample bosom. Her body language indicated seriousness, but was she? She’d embarassed him enough times in the
past. Was this just another opportunity to be played the fool?
In the BETTER example everything is revealed through John’s senses. That is how you control point of view.
Do this and you will be light years ahead in your writing.